Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
The Search for the Forgotten Land
starring Ray and Zombie Ray and introducing Reginald
It was a lovely spring day, and Ray was relaxing by the horse stable with Zombie Ray, at the old homestead. The worker was heading home from fertilising the crops on the tractor, and the cattle had been let out to graze.
"You know Zombie my friend, it's a bloody beaut place to be isn't it?" said Ray, inexplicably speaking with an Australian accent.
"Gnuuurgh?" said Zombie Ray, looking curiously at his friend.
"Holy crap, what happened then?" said Ray, noticing with relief his accent was normal again. "I've been watching far too much Home and Away!"
"gnuuurgh hrruuuurf, mate" said Zombie Ray, nodding his head.
Just then a loud noise caught their attention. The looked up to see Reginald, Zombie Ray's bat friend hovering overhead. He looked distraught as he circled about to land.
Zombie Ray sat with his companion and listened carefully, the bat told a tale of a wondrous place, called the Forgotten Land, but the journey was fraught with Peril (with a capital P, as you can see)
The two friends knew that they had to try to get there, the fertilising had been done, and it would be some time before the crops were ready to harvest, and besides, their horses hadn't been ridden in some time. So they saddled up and rode away, leaving the farm in the distance, Reginald the bat leading them ever onwards.
They came to the ocean, and reluctantly left their mounts behind, as Reginald flew ahead, Ray and Zombie ray set out swimming. Then, out of nowhere, they heard oddly familiar music. It took them a few minutes to work out what it meant and by then it was to late!!! SHARK!!!! The shark grabbed Ray by the legs and tried to take him under, but Zombie Ray, thinking quickly, leapt onto the sharks back, raining down blows with his fists and elbows. The shark had never encountered such a ferocious attack and promptly let Ray go. Zombie Ray used his superhuman endurance to help Ray swim the rest of the way
They came to an unfamiliar land, where a mountainous landscape stretched before them. They had no idea which direction to head, when they came across a young explorer, "Hi I'm Dora" she said.
"Can you show us how to get to the legendary cave, that leads to the Forgotten Land? asked Ray
"Sure" smiled Dora,"I'll just check my map"
With that the most disturbing thing happened, out of her backpack flew a map, which sang as it opened itself up, "I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the maaaap"
Ray and Zombie Ray leapt back in horror at the sight of the mutant chart, but Dora seemed unconcerned. She worked out a path with 3 landmarks, and replacing the "map" in her backpack they set off. They had gone about halfway when the habit of Dora incessantly singing the 3 landmarks, and the unpredictable antics of her possessed backpack, were too much for the Rays, they thanked her and set off on their own. Last they saw she seemed to be fighting off a fox.
They worked their way over the mountain and found the cave, it was surrounded my spined, poisonous plants and guarded by a ferocious dragon. It had already pinned Reginald to the ground and was roaring menacingly.
"Raaauuurgh!" cried Zombie Ray
"It'll be ok" said Ray, "We'll save him"
The two men circled the dragon and after a brief but intense fight they managed to slay the dragon and save Reginald, now all they had to do was make it safely through the cave. It was dark and still, but they forged ahead.
As they emerged from the cave that tunnelled into the very heart of the mountain, they were confronted by a leafy tunnel, they could see light at the end and decided that they had come this far so they joined hands and walked through
and they emerged into... My Little Pony Land!! No wonder it had been forgotten, it had been some time since they had graced every television and little girls room. The Pony's explained that they felt very lonely and when Reginald had found them, they asked him to find them some company. They offered Ray and Zombie Ray delicious cakes, candy and lemonade, and in return the Ray's told them stories of the world today, with Transformers and talking sponges. The Ponies felt that they might prefer to stay where they were, but thanked the Rays for visiting.
They all gathered to farewell their new friends, who would ride home on a beautiful white unicorn, a friend of the ponies, who would be able to bring them back to visit any time they wanted.
And so they returned to the farm, and all lived happily ever after.
HAPPY HALLOWEEEN EVERYONE!!!!!!
It was a lovely spring day, and Ray was relaxing by the horse stable with Zombie Ray, at the old homestead. The worker was heading home from fertilising the crops on the tractor, and the cattle had been let out to graze.
"You know Zombie my friend, it's a bloody beaut place to be isn't it?" said Ray, inexplicably speaking with an Australian accent.
"Gnuuurgh?" said Zombie Ray, looking curiously at his friend.
"Holy crap, what happened then?" said Ray, noticing with relief his accent was normal again. "I've been watching far too much Home and Away!"
"gnuuurgh hrruuuurf, mate" said Zombie Ray, nodding his head.
Just then a loud noise caught their attention. The looked up to see Reginald, Zombie Ray's bat friend hovering overhead. He looked distraught as he circled about to land.
Zombie Ray sat with his companion and listened carefully, the bat told a tale of a wondrous place, called the Forgotten Land, but the journey was fraught with Peril (with a capital P, as you can see)
The two friends knew that they had to try to get there, the fertilising had been done, and it would be some time before the crops were ready to harvest, and besides, their horses hadn't been ridden in some time. So they saddled up and rode away, leaving the farm in the distance, Reginald the bat leading them ever onwards.
They came to the ocean, and reluctantly left their mounts behind, as Reginald flew ahead, Ray and Zombie ray set out swimming. Then, out of nowhere, they heard oddly familiar music. It took them a few minutes to work out what it meant and by then it was to late!!! SHARK!!!! The shark grabbed Ray by the legs and tried to take him under, but Zombie Ray, thinking quickly, leapt onto the sharks back, raining down blows with his fists and elbows. The shark had never encountered such a ferocious attack and promptly let Ray go. Zombie Ray used his superhuman endurance to help Ray swim the rest of the way
They came to an unfamiliar land, where a mountainous landscape stretched before them. They had no idea which direction to head, when they came across a young explorer, "Hi I'm Dora" she said.
"Can you show us how to get to the legendary cave, that leads to the Forgotten Land? asked Ray
"Sure" smiled Dora,"I'll just check my map"
With that the most disturbing thing happened, out of her backpack flew a map, which sang as it opened itself up, "I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the maaaap"
Ray and Zombie Ray leapt back in horror at the sight of the mutant chart, but Dora seemed unconcerned. She worked out a path with 3 landmarks, and replacing the "map" in her backpack they set off. They had gone about halfway when the habit of Dora incessantly singing the 3 landmarks, and the unpredictable antics of her possessed backpack, were too much for the Rays, they thanked her and set off on their own. Last they saw she seemed to be fighting off a fox.
They worked their way over the mountain and found the cave, it was surrounded my spined, poisonous plants and guarded by a ferocious dragon. It had already pinned Reginald to the ground and was roaring menacingly.
"Raaauuurgh!" cried Zombie Ray
"It'll be ok" said Ray, "We'll save him"
The two men circled the dragon and after a brief but intense fight they managed to slay the dragon and save Reginald, now all they had to do was make it safely through the cave. It was dark and still, but they forged ahead.
As they emerged from the cave that tunnelled into the very heart of the mountain, they were confronted by a leafy tunnel, they could see light at the end and decided that they had come this far so they joined hands and walked through
and they emerged into... My Little Pony Land!! No wonder it had been forgotten, it had been some time since they had graced every television and little girls room. The Pony's explained that they felt very lonely and when Reginald had found them, they asked him to find them some company. They offered Ray and Zombie Ray delicious cakes, candy and lemonade, and in return the Ray's told them stories of the world today, with Transformers and talking sponges. The Ponies felt that they might prefer to stay where they were, but thanked the Rays for visiting.
They all gathered to farewell their new friends, who would ride home on a beautiful white unicorn, a friend of the ponies, who would be able to bring them back to visit any time they wanted.
And so they returned to the farm, and all lived happily ever after.
HAPPY HALLOWEEEN EVERYONE!!!!!!
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
"SPIDER!!!!" starring Ray, Zombie Ray and introducing "Spudda"
An Early Halloween Story...
One stormy night Ray and Zombie Ray were driving along a deserted road when a bolt of lightning lit the lonely desolate landscape. Thunder rumbled and the car shook slightly from it's proximity.
"Uuuuurgh" said Zombie Ray
"for sure" said Ray "I'll be glad to get home too. I tell you it'd be a bad place to break down"
"OoooUrrrgh!!" moaned Zombie Ray
"Sorry, " replied Ray "don't mean to jinx our trip!"
They continued down the road, Zombie Ray pointed out an old wooden sign and Ray slowed down to try ad see if it told them how much further the next town was.
BEWARE....DERELICT MANSION AHEAD the sign read.
"Uuurdruuuoogh, uuuh buuuostuuur!"
"Totally" said Ray, "maybe we should have picked up those kids with that big dog and the broken down van, it's a bad night to be out, but they looked pesky to me too"
He eased his foot off the brake and down onto the accelerator but the engine suddenly made an unnerving knocking sound.
"OOOOOOGH!!!" yelled Zombie Ray angrily, banging his fists down on the dashboard.
Just then the engine died completely and the lights went out, leaving them sitting in the middle of a storm in almost total darkness.
"Jinkys!" said Ray "What are we going to do now?"
Lightning once again lit the sky and the forbidding silhouette of the Old Hambly Place loomed close by the side of the road.
"Well I guess we can't stay here" said Ray "C'mon Zee grab some of that newspaper to hold over your head and we'll make a run for it"
They reached the porch of the mansion and shook the rain from their curls, Zombie Ray turned as the next lightning came, holding his arms up, shaking his fists and groaning loudly at the sky.
"Oh give it a break" said Ray brushing the rain droplets from his jacket and adjusting his tie.
"Uuuoouurgh" said Zombie Ray apologetically
"Habit or no habit, it's still annoying" said Ray
Zombie Ray hung his head.
Just then the door swung open and a cool dusty breeze blew past them. Brushing aside cobwebs they entered, thinking they may as well be dry.
But the moment the walked over the threshold a giant spider dropped from above pinning Ray to the ground, it's fangs dripping as it lowered it's head toward him.
Zombie Ray, looking around grabbed a curtain rod, (that looked remarkable like a giant skewer) and struck the spider on the back of it's quivering abdomen.
The spider reared up and Ray rolled quickly from under it, but it grabbed Zombie Ray around the neck with it's front legs.
"Uuuuuuurgh!!!" he yelled, "uuuurgh" as the spider began to squeeze. He used what strength he had to kick the curtain rod that had dropped between the spiders legs, in Ray's direction.
Ray ducked under the swinging rear legs and grabbed the curtain rod and stabbed at the spiders head.
The spider roared, which caused Zombie Ray and Ray to look at each other quizzically as they didn't know spiders made noises like that, and fell, it's grasp releasing from Zombie Ray's neck. It tried to right itself, it's legs waving wildly knocking over the old furniture in the room. Ray and Zombie Ray moved together and both grabbing the curtain rod, thrust it into the writhing arachnids thorax. The spider convulsed once then lay still.
The two Rays moved to stand over the spider, and zombie Ray looked over at Ray pleadingly.
"Oh ok" said Ray "and I think I'll join you"
They both raised their arms and yelled "UUUREEEOOOOOAAARRRGH!!!!!!"
It seemed the storm was easing, so Ray got Zombie Ray to hold the door he pulled off it's hinges over the engine while he took a look.
"Well here's the problem!" he cried, tightening down the distributor cap. The got into the car and Ray turned the key, the engine springing to life with a comforting "vrooom'
Donning sunglasses they drove off down the road, now brightening as the sun rose over the hills.
One stormy night Ray and Zombie Ray were driving along a deserted road when a bolt of lightning lit the lonely desolate landscape. Thunder rumbled and the car shook slightly from it's proximity.
"Uuuuurgh" said Zombie Ray
"for sure" said Ray "I'll be glad to get home too. I tell you it'd be a bad place to break down"
"OoooUrrrgh!!" moaned Zombie Ray
"Sorry, " replied Ray "don't mean to jinx our trip!"
They continued down the road, Zombie Ray pointed out an old wooden sign and Ray slowed down to try ad see if it told them how much further the next town was.
BEWARE....DERELICT MANSION AHEAD the sign read.
"Uuurdruuuoogh, uuuh buuuostuuur!"
"Totally" said Ray, "maybe we should have picked up those kids with that big dog and the broken down van, it's a bad night to be out, but they looked pesky to me too"
He eased his foot off the brake and down onto the accelerator but the engine suddenly made an unnerving knocking sound.
"OOOOOOGH!!!" yelled Zombie Ray angrily, banging his fists down on the dashboard.
Just then the engine died completely and the lights went out, leaving them sitting in the middle of a storm in almost total darkness.
"Jinkys!" said Ray "What are we going to do now?"
Lightning once again lit the sky and the forbidding silhouette of the Old Hambly Place loomed close by the side of the road.
"Well I guess we can't stay here" said Ray "C'mon Zee grab some of that newspaper to hold over your head and we'll make a run for it"
They reached the porch of the mansion and shook the rain from their curls, Zombie Ray turned as the next lightning came, holding his arms up, shaking his fists and groaning loudly at the sky.
"Oh give it a break" said Ray brushing the rain droplets from his jacket and adjusting his tie.
"Uuuoouurgh" said Zombie Ray apologetically
"Habit or no habit, it's still annoying" said Ray
Zombie Ray hung his head.
Just then the door swung open and a cool dusty breeze blew past them. Brushing aside cobwebs they entered, thinking they may as well be dry.
But the moment the walked over the threshold a giant spider dropped from above pinning Ray to the ground, it's fangs dripping as it lowered it's head toward him.
Zombie Ray, looking around grabbed a curtain rod, (that looked remarkable like a giant skewer) and struck the spider on the back of it's quivering abdomen.
The spider reared up and Ray rolled quickly from under it, but it grabbed Zombie Ray around the neck with it's front legs.
"Uuuuuuurgh!!!" he yelled, "uuuurgh" as the spider began to squeeze. He used what strength he had to kick the curtain rod that had dropped between the spiders legs, in Ray's direction.
Ray ducked under the swinging rear legs and grabbed the curtain rod and stabbed at the spiders head.
The spider roared, which caused Zombie Ray and Ray to look at each other quizzically as they didn't know spiders made noises like that, and fell, it's grasp releasing from Zombie Ray's neck. It tried to right itself, it's legs waving wildly knocking over the old furniture in the room. Ray and Zombie Ray moved together and both grabbing the curtain rod, thrust it into the writhing arachnids thorax. The spider convulsed once then lay still.
The two Rays moved to stand over the spider, and zombie Ray looked over at Ray pleadingly.
"Oh ok" said Ray "and I think I'll join you"
They both raised their arms and yelled "UUUREEEOOOOOAAARRRGH!!!!!!"
It seemed the storm was easing, so Ray got Zombie Ray to hold the door he pulled off it's hinges over the engine while he took a look.
"Well here's the problem!" he cried, tightening down the distributor cap. The got into the car and Ray turned the key, the engine springing to life with a comforting "vrooom'
Donning sunglasses they drove off down the road, now brightening as the sun rose over the hills.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Townsville Defence Forces Air Show
Air Show - September 26, 2009
The Strand
12:00pm - 3:05pm
* ‘Force 10’ Air Force Band Performance
* ADF Precision Drill Team display
* ‘Force 10’ Air Force Band Performance
* The Air Force ‘Roulettes’ Display Team – PC9
* UH-1H Iroquois (Huey) helicopter
* P2-V Neptune (Maritime patrol - historic aircraft)
* USAF C-17 Globemaster display
* C182 + Skydivers
* Sea Cat Seaplane (Red Baron)
3:05pm – 3:10pm
BREAK
3:10pm - 6:45pm
* Virgin Airlines Embraer 190
* USAF ‘Thunderbirds’ formation display – F-16 Fighting Falcon
* USAF KC-10 (Strategic Air Refuelling Tanker)
* C-130 – Hercules (Strategic and Tactical Transport)
* F-111 Ardvaark (Long- range Strike)
* F/A-18 Hornets (Air Superiority and Ground Attack Fighter)
* Army CH-60 Blackhawk
* CH-47 Chinook/MRH-90
(note guy sitting on front step waving)
(note guy sitting in open back bay waving)
wetting everyone
The Chinook, Blackhawk and the newly purchased helicopter
* ADF Precision Drill Team
* ‘Force 10’ Air Force Band Performance
6:45pm 2 x F-111 ‘ Dump And Burn’
Prior To Commencement of Fireworks
The RAAF Base Open Day- September 27, 2009
F1-11
Chinook (my favourite helicopter)
Hawk 127
FA-18
USAF KC-10 Strategic Air Refuelling Tanker
Globemaster
Hercules
Thunderbirds
Roulettes
Fire that stooped us on the way home
The Strand
12:00pm - 3:05pm
* ‘Force 10’ Air Force Band Performance
* ADF Precision Drill Team display
* ‘Force 10’ Air Force Band Performance
* The Air Force ‘Roulettes’ Display Team – PC9
* UH-1H Iroquois (Huey) helicopter
* P2-V Neptune (Maritime patrol - historic aircraft)
* USAF C-17 Globemaster display
* C182 + Skydivers
* Sea Cat Seaplane (Red Baron)
3:05pm – 3:10pm
BREAK
3:10pm - 6:45pm
* Virgin Airlines Embraer 190
* USAF ‘Thunderbirds’ formation display – F-16 Fighting Falcon
* USAF KC-10 (Strategic Air Refuelling Tanker)
* C-130 – Hercules (Strategic and Tactical Transport)
* F-111 Ardvaark (Long- range Strike)
* F/A-18 Hornets (Air Superiority and Ground Attack Fighter)
* Army CH-60 Blackhawk
* CH-47 Chinook/MRH-90
(note guy sitting on front step waving)
(note guy sitting in open back bay waving)
wetting everyone
The Chinook, Blackhawk and the newly purchased helicopter
* ADF Precision Drill Team
* ‘Force 10’ Air Force Band Performance
6:45pm 2 x F-111 ‘ Dump And Burn’
Prior To Commencement of Fireworks
The RAAF Base Open Day- September 27, 2009
F1-11
Chinook (my favourite helicopter)
Hawk 127
FA-18
USAF KC-10 Strategic Air Refuelling Tanker
Globemaster
Hercules
Thunderbirds
Roulettes
Fire that stooped us on the way home
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